Have You Seen My Brain?

Have you seen my brain?  I used to know where it was at all times, tucked neatly between my hair and my chin.  It was reliable and always there for me.  So what, may I ask, have I done to scare it away?

I used to be the most reliable person I knew.  I was punctual and even a few minutes early to any appointment.  I always wrote things down and never missed meeting or appointments.  I was so reliable that sometimes I drove myself nuts.  However, I can’t say this has been the case in the last 12 months.

Lest you think middle age has set in and is what has affected my brain lately, I would like to discuss three possible theories for the missing brain.  First of all, I had surgery one year ago.  Major surgery.  Total knee replacement surgery.  While I don’t think my wonderful surgeon took a detour to my brain while sawing into my knee, I do believe that the anesthesia could have long lasting effects.  This long?  I don’t know, but it is part of my first theory.  Even though I have been off the pain meds associated with the surgery for a long long time; who knows what the effects of that is too? 

The next part of Theory Number One is that I was home recovering for three months, backed up to a two month summer vacation.  Never in my life have I not worked for five months.  Although it was not a ‘vacation’, I did settle into a sort of semi-retirement mode.  Some days my main goal was to shower and do my exercises.  Other more ambitious days may have included a trip to the food store.  All of a sudden, time wasn’t important.  I didn’t even really need to wear my watch.  (Gasp!)  When I did have an appointment to go to, it was stressful to get there on time.  I came to resent the clock.

But the main part of Theory Number One was that I only had one responsibility, not 21.  My accountability was to my knee and myself.  That became my top priority.  The responsibilities of my job, running a non-profit organization, and keeping up with household chores were delegated to others.  I think that once you slow down, it is hard to gear back up. That is why many times when I am on a roll cleaning, grading papers, or running around town doing errands, I do not stop until I am finished, because if I slow down, I go into relaxation mode and then it is all downhill from there.

If you are not buying into Theory Number One as the demise of my lost brain, let me offer Theory Number Two.  My Smartphone.  You may remember a past blog while I wrestled with whether to get one or not; I know my friend Jack remembers the blog well.  Shortly after my surgery, well within the year that my brain has been missing, I decided to retire my flip phone and join the rest of the world with my use of a Smartphone.  With so much time on my hands, I even went to not one, but two classes on how to use it at the local Verizon store in the mall. 

One of the cool features of the Smartphone was its calendar.  How awesome was it to book my next physical therapy appointment before I left the current session, without having to go home and look at a calendar?  I had all the information at my fingertips.  I quickly became addicted and checked my Smartphone calendar each morning to see what was in store for me that day.  The problem arose when my husband insisted I also write things on the paper calendar.  This was always our treated as our Family Bible for events.  If it wasn’t written down, then it wasn’t happening...

The problem was when I returned to real life after five months, I floundered between trying to keep up with using both methods.  Some things got recorded on one place and not the other.  Depending which I consulted in the morning, that could be a problem..

There is one other theory, which is my addiction to Spider Solitaire.  It is a mindless, relaxing game.  I now believe its addiction could possibly eat away at your brain cells.  Hence, Theory Number Three.   Just one more game…just one more game that I win…ok this really will be my last game…  How many of you will admit to being addicted to this or another similar game?  My brain could be spending hours a week doing more productive things, but there may be some validity to Theory Number Three.

I miss having my brain with me in full force 24/7.  I am not sure what has contributed to its AWOL status.  But when you are out and about this week, if you see it in Starbucks, the mall, or hiking in the woods, can you give me a call on my Smartphone?